Wednesday, December 12, 2007

This is completely non-music related

This has to do with what's been going on in my house for the past few days. None of it involves the viola, which I haven't touched except for a rehearsal on Monday evening.

My husband and I decided a while back (like when we first moved in) to have proper ceramic tiles laid in the bathrooms and the kitchen. Finally, we got our act together, got measurements done, picked tile, etc. We booked the tilers to come on Monday. And they did, and they got right to work.

They crack me up; it's a total good cop, bad cop scenario. The first of the two men is very polite, quiet, respectful. The second has the mouth of a sailor and talks to me like I'm severely mentally handicapped, explaining the most basic things about plumbing and carpentry to me ("water comes through these pipes and out through the tap"). Not that it's relevant, but I'm not sure that he realizes that I installed several of our light fixtures and (along with a good deal of assistance) installed taps in two bathrooms, have fixed our toilets on more than one occasion, not to mention a good deal of other reno work. Somehow, in this man's mind, these are impossibilities. It could be that the tiny feminist in me is getting my back up and seeing sexism where there is none; I'm perfectly aware that there's a reason for the term "handyMAN" and I have no problem with that. I just pride myself on basic comprehension that gravity + water + leaky whatever = wet floor.

He also said something the other day about my husband going off to "make money," which cracked me up. I think that my being home during the day serves as evidence that I am a pampered, non-working, bonbon-eating lazy person who is spoiled by her hard-working husband. Adorable. If only it were so.

He has real anger issues---my husband came home the other day and saw the guy throw one of the tiles with such energy that he managed to break one of the tiles that he'd just laid, which then meant of course that he had to tear it up and replace it. His outbursts (generally a result of something he's done) are along the lines of "Mother******* sonofabitch Jesus ****ing what the ****," well, you get the idea....and they occur about once every five minutes.

Naturally, being a tiler, he knows everything about plumbing. So he pointed out to me on day one that there were leaks, one in a shut-off valve on our pedestal sink (yes, I realized that when I turned it off, disconnected it and it leaked, which is why I then reconnected it, but thanks for the enlightenment) and one on a toilet valve. Somehow the two guys managed to work around it. I shut off the water source so that the drips could be kept to a minimum and we kept various receptacles under the leaks so they wouldn't ruin everyone's lives.

The next day, they came in again and unfortunately for me, the poet laureate shut off the water himself, even after I'd asked them to let me know if they needed anything. He didn't ask me where the correct valve was. I think you can see where this is going. And at the end of the day, half our laundry room was flooded. He'd somehow shut off a different valve from the one I'd used, which then spewed water all over the corner of the room. And when I'd dealt with the aftermath and corrected the valve, I realized that our hot water is now...not. so. hot. In fact, it comes out hot for a few seconds then returns to a very tepid state. I have no idea why this would be the case; all I know is that, until that happy little man laid his hands on my water heater, it worked just great.

Today someone will come and grout the final bathroom. It may or may not be the same men. I'm really hoping it's not so that I can just call their boss directly and explain the issue.

Ah, the joys of home ownership.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Orchestra viola-ing

I've been rehearsing for a few upcoming performances in a section of 8 violas, which is a lot of fun. It's nice to be a ringer sometimes and sit at the back.

A few things hit me whenever I play in a section or with a symphony orchestra. I'm well aware that job satisfaction has long since been low for orchestral players, and much higher for chamber players, and I see evidence of it everywhere. I don't even know where to begin. All the people I've met in this particular gig are perfectly nice, but I don't see a lot of laugh lines. There are certain tendencies among orchestral musicians, and while I hate to generalize, I think that it's valid to say that there's a certain amount of artistic freedom/control that one loses in that setting, particularly for section string players. We become filler, somehow. So we seek to express ourselves in other ways, and when various aspects of the our musical realm become compromised, we rebel.

Things often appear to bother orchestral musicians with tenure that wouldn't bother a freelancer, who might resist rocking the boat, quite so much. Like missing 10 seconds of one's break to continue a musical phrase to its completion. And that sort of thing. The forest disappears for the trees and tiny issues can become Himalayan in dimension.

People in the middle of the section will turn around, insistent that they make sure that the stand behind them received the message that there should be a line over the quarter note G in measure 57. Or that there be a natural marked over the 14th 16th note in measure 32, even if no one played it incorrectly to begin with. And so on. It's almost like micromanagement becomes a way of life because how else do we get to speak out? Musicians naturally perform; we long to prove ourselves and to show the world what we can do, or something along those lines. At any rate, we perform; we are trained to perform. It's hard to feel that you're doing that that when there are 7 or more people sitting around you, playing the same notes at the same dynamic as you.

The beautiful thing about being in a quartet is that you can pretty well always voice your opinions. And you get to control pretty much all of what you're doing; obviously the rest of the group has input but your musical lines, your sound, your instrument are ultimately your own.

I'm trying to be diplomatic here. When I was younger it seemed to me that the ultimate would be to win a job in an orchestra and stay there forever, and now that idea's entirely lost its appeal. But that has nothing to do with music or the hierarchy of musicians, if there is such a thing; it's simply personal preference. I have a high regard for orchestral musicians and I don't want to come off in any sort of snotty way, or to fail to convey how much enjoyment I derive from playing orchestral works. All I know is that I hope that I never cease to enjoy what I'm doing or get caught up in the trivial details, and that seems common among orchestral players. As I've mentioned before, there's a lot of complaining about the gig, the conductor, the pay, the concert hall, the other musicians, etc.

Just to provide examples of the strange and high-strung manifestations of not-quite-happiness that I've witnessed over the years in orchestral settings:

I've been barked at in orchestras for the following: my case was too big and it bothered the extremely ornery oboist, who made me put it backstage (this was during a rehearsal). She was afraid that it might eventually touch something belonging to her. She told me that I should buy a smaller case. Funnily enough, I eventually did. Not sure if she had anything to do with it. I'm now back to a monster case.

A stand partner once slapped my hand because she felt that I was going to turn the page prematurely.

Another stand partner, in a section which I was leading, erased all my bowings in front of my eyes in the Marriage of Figaro Overture, and said, "I've been playing it my way for forty years and that's how I'm going to play it now."

I've had my section ask me to move more, to cue every note, to stop moving, to not be so tall, you name it. I've been lectured by stand partners on my playing volume, articulation, aforementioned page turning skills. I was once told by a woman in an amateur orchestra that I would never be able to make a living as a musician, since, as she put it, she couldn't.

I was told, after playing an audition and "tying" for the job (meaning that only one of the two of us would ultimately get it but we both still had to sit through a month-long trial first, just to make sure our ulcers were well-developed), that the only issue with the audition was that my sound wasn't big enough and they wanted someone who could "cover up" the lesser players in the section. That was disheartening a) because I never thought I'd have a job that consisted of playing so loudly that I would entirely swallow up some poor soul's sound, and b) because that wasn't what I thought I was auditioning for.

And I'm not entirely sure why all these things have happened or why I find them so amusing still. And maybe they're not typical occurences, but I rather think they are. And I think that musicians forget why they're musicians with far too much frequency.

To quote a cute little 90-pound model on television the other day, "Find a job you love doing and you'll never work a day in your life." I think that's always been my mantra---I just didn't know it.

Sunday, December 2, 2007

December

is here for sure. I drove downtown (Toronto) today to play a gig. Had I not had to leave the house, I would've happily stayed in and avoided the amazing wealth of slipperiness out there. It was really something; I pride myself on being a true Canadian; I drive like a fiend and refuse to get stuck but my little car was simply unwilling to tackle the uphill skating rink road conditions. And yet, I survived. I'll check on the viola soon and see if it's in one piece; its strings have been flying out of tune in shock and horror at the weather. I think it must be its youthful naiveté that makes it so vulnerable to this cold.

I haven't been practicing as much as I should but I have forced myself to pull out the ol' excerpts. I haven't played an orchestral audition in years and don't know if I ever will again, but I do find that excerpts are a quick and efficient way of getting myself into shape. A combo Brahms Haydn Variations/Don Juan/Marriage of Figaro/Beethoven 5 sort of set seems to cover my trouble areas. Kind of like wearing a muumuu, I guess.

I find it terrifically difficult to meet goals if I don't set them so I've decided that some solo work and the excerpts will be my target for the near future. The Quartet's functioning but we're sort of moving in slow motion as we're tackling more admin work than playing at the moment...so it's to each his own in terms of personal playing maintenance.

off to play some orchestra concerts this week; Enigma Variations and Saint-Saens Violin Concerto, among other works...it'll be nice being in a section. Maybe I'll re-learn how to be a stand partner...